6 tips on how to not play it safe

1. Go against what everyone tells you to do
Fear: “I’ll be doing something wrong, people will disagree with me, and I’ll have made a terrible mistake that will be stamped on my forehead the rest of my life.”
Payoff: You’ll learn. You’ll be empowered. And, most people who are successful do not follow the rules; they make their own.
Best Example: Mark Zuckerberg from Facebook dropped out of Harvard to develop Facebook. You think people supported his decision to drop out of college, not to mention the prestigious, Harvard?

2. Listen to your heart and not your logic
Fear: “My heart has no idea what’s good for me and I’m a practical person, so logic is the only thing that makes sense.”
Payoff: Your heart will lead you in directions that are different and unfamiliar, but it’s a more intuitive path. Listening to your heart also takes faith and trust in yourself, two things that are not easy, but come with big payoffs.
Best Example: Most bands. Anyone with a bit of logic would quit pursuing the music industry, because the likelihood of actually getting anywhere in that industry is slim. But, some get through and it’s exponentially worth the faith. For example, Death Cab for Cutie formed in 1997 and didn’t go mainstream (partly their own choice, but partly not) ’till 2003. That’s six years of limited radio play, weak CD sales, sleeping on couches, and eating ramen on their tour bus (which was probably a van).

3. Put yourself out there
Fear: “People won’t like me.”
Payoff: People will. But, people won’t, as well. It will make you stronger and happier, because humans thrive with interaction. And, your fear only serves as confinement. Whether it’s building a blog readership or meeting friends for a drink at the bar, if you’re not present, you’re already behind.
Best Example: Anyone who dates online and finds the love of their life. Hell, back up, ANYONE who signs up for online dating. That takes guts, especially if you meet someone in person. However, I have a few friends who have had success with online dating, including one that is getting married in a few months to someone she met through Match.com. That kind of makes me want to go, “awwww,” but I’ll spare it.

(by rosiehardy)

4. Dance on stage, sing karaoke, be a volunteer at a magic show
Fear: “I’ll look like a fool. People will laugh at me. I’ll be humiliated.”
Payoff: You’ll look like a fool. People will laugh with you. You’ll be surprised at how much you’ll love it.
Best Example: Ellen dances on her talk show everyday and personally, I think she looks like a fool, but in the best, most beautiful way possible. She seems free of worry and shame and insecurity. It’s truly inspiring (and it’s just a silly couple minutes of dancing).

5. Be clear on your dream(s)
Fear: “If I’m too clear and too into my dream and it doesn’t come true, what will I have left? I’ll be so disappointed.”
Payoff: Even letting in the possibility that your dream won’t come true is setting into works that it won’t. Being clear and believing, 100%, that you will achieve it, will make it happen. Dude, that may sound corny, but it’s true.
Best Example: What does Lance Armstrong do? He bikes. What did he set out to do? Win the Tour de France. When I read his book, I was blown away with how focused he was on cycling. And, it wasn’t about IF he won the Tour de France, it was about WHEN. (And, truly, all odds were against him.)

6. Fail
Fear: “This proves, once and for all, that I am inadequate and incompetent. I knew it.”
Payoff: The best lesson I think anyone can learn are the ones that blossom from failure. You learn how to be resilient and self-sufficient. You learn how to be innovative with your approach, because you failed, so you need a new plan. Mostly, you learn things about yourself that you didn’t even know you needed to. And, that’s priceless.
Best Example: Robert Downey Jr. A few years ago, he failed, basically, at life. And, his career dwindled to nothingness. But, then he came back stronger than ever and his career is better than it was before. His failure must have opened up parts of himself that he didn’t know needed to be examined. And, it pushed him to be better.

I’ve noticed that there’s an inherent fear of “coloring outside the lines.” And, why shouldn’t there be? At the slightest gesture of going against the norm, any one person can be hit with an onslaught of criticism. But, what we need to remember is that very few people have been extremely successful and actually inspired change by following the rules and playing it safe. It’s practically unheard of.

(by rosiehardy)

Believe me, I spent the better half of last week kicking the naysayers voices out of my head and replacing them with the affirmation that I am going for my dreams, doing things I believe in, making choices that are difficult, talking about choices that people don’t agree with, and putting myself out there in a big way.

I’m done playing it safe. Are you?

(originally posted at intersected)